Golden Clouds of Dawn
by KimOfDrac
Summary: After almost a year together, Derek Morgan wants to tell the team the truth, but Spencer Reid fears he'll lose his job, his friends... His life. How will he deal with it? Bad summary, read the story. If you like it so far, let me know and I'll continue
1. Chapter 1

_Dear Diary_

_Isn't it weird how everyone always start like that? As if the diary was a person? I'm not even sure why I do, I know you don't even have a mind… And still I adress you as "you"._

_Anyway, I'll let my brain rest for a while, even if that is practically impossible too, the brain is always active… I need to pour my heart out, really._

_I'd like to add, I won't do that literally!_

_The thing is… Derek told me he want to tell the others about us, and I'm scared._

_This job means everything to me. I have friends there, I have my life there… I can't take the risk of losing it!_

_I'm trying to think about what's the most important, Derek's happiness or my job. I wonder – can I even compare the two?_

_I mean I love Derek with every fiber of my being, and I'm not going to argue with that one, even if most fibers in my body can't feel love… It's a mixture of hormones you see… But it does feel like I do love him with every single fibre that makes me who I am. He makes me who I am. Do I make any sense, Diary?_

_How stupid is this… You're not going to answer me…_

_But Diary… Without my job, I'm nothing, and without Derek I'm pretty much nothing aswell, so what do I do?_

_I told him I need some time, and he said that was fine, but he told me we have to tell the others pretty soon._

_I'm going to have a glass of whiskey right now. For once I really need a drink._

_Yours truly_

_Spencer_

…

The robust floor lamp in the livingroom made the polished leather backs of the dozens of books glimmer in their shelves. It was a little over 9 pm and Spencer Reid sat in his old, large chair with a glass of Blanton's finest whiskey hanging from his fingers.

He stared out into the nothingness of his turned off TV. He had unbuttoned his shirt a bit and rolled up his sleeves. It was nice and warm in the room.

His cell started blinking with it's harsh, blue light and he looked at it as it moved with every vibration on the table. He reached over and took the call. He already knew it was Derek Morgan.

"Doctor Reid" Reid answered. He always did, no matter who it was that called him.

"Hello there" Morgan's voice replied and Reid couldn't help but smile a little. "What you doin' at this time of the day, doctor?"

Reid glanced over at his glass.

"I'm having a drink, Agent Morgan… And you?"

Reid took a sip of the smokey drink.

"You drinkin' all by yourself? Now that must mean something's up" Morgan said. Reid pressed his lips together and cleared his throat.

"No, I'm fine… Just really worn out" he said with a sigh.

"I could come over and rub those worn out shoulders… For a start" Morgan teased. Reid smiled again.

"Thank you, but I'm okay. I'm off to bed soon anyway"

Morgan chuckled.

"Alright, Pretty Boy. I will see you at work tomorrow"

Reid nodded.

"Yes. Will you have coffee ready when I get there?" he asked softly.

"I always have. Don't get too drunk now"

"I promise"

"I love you" Morgan said sweetly. Reid loved the way he said those words.

"I love you too" he replied and they both hung up.

Reid sighed and finished his drink. He could see Strauss in his mind, telling him to pack his things and leave the team. He was scared, but he hadn't told Morgan that. He had said he wanted some time… That was all.

But the truth was he was scared… Really scared. Only the thought of it made a sore lump grow in his throat and after the whiskey it burned even worse.

He took a deep breath and got ready for bed. He knew the nightmares would come, but there was nothing he could do about it.

The so called destiny, wich he did not believe in, had to form the next few days.


	2. Chapter 2

The night passed by slowly and Reid didn't get much sleep. He could almost laugh at himself for worrying so much.

He wondered if Morgan had slept better than him… Of course he had. Derek Morgan wasn't afraid of anything, well obviously something, he was human after all, but not even close to Reid's fears. Or was it just one true fear that covered them all? The fear of being alone…

He knew very well it wasn't healthy to think those thoughts at all, especially not before work, but it was a part of his persona, it was what made him Spencer Reid.

At that moment he didn't like being Spencer Reid.

He got up and walked down the hall to the bathroom, where he turned on the shower and got undressed.

He looked at himself in the mirror for a while. He had changed alot, probably because of all he had been through. He wasn't young anymore, at least not mentally. Sure, he had been extremely intelligent all his life, but he had never faced the dangers of the outside world until he joined the FBI, and the knowledge of what people excisted out there, the minds, the weapons, the fantasies… It made him older. Torn.

He stepped into the shower and let the hot water soften his tense muscles. He washed his long hair and scrubbed his skin. Then, he stepped out of the shower, wrapped a towel around his waist and wiped away the condensation from the mirror with his hand. He shaved slowly with the sharp razor knife before getting dressed.

It was a normal morning, but he had a tight knot in his stomach that wouldn't go away.

_If you just tell Derek how you feel about it he will understand_, he thought and calmed himself down a little bit. A deep sigh escaped his lungs and he quickly downed his mug of coffee.

He drove in silence, except for the soft tunes of Beethoven from the car radio. The street lights were still lit, it was only 7 am.

Somehow, Reid found the dimmed, red lights calming, almost romantic, and he felt relaxed for once.

So far, just like any normal day.

The elevator was, however, exeptionally slow and it didn't help his nerves at all. He felt slightly claustrophobic, but took a few deep breaths and tried to think of something else… Morgan for example.

"_Hey, pretty boy, we're done for today" Morgan said and knocked Reid on the shoulder lightly. The young genius snapped out of his thoughts and looked up._

"_Yeah, yeah… I was just thinking" Reid said and moved his hair behind his ear with his slim fingers. "What's with that anyway?"_

"_With what?" Morgan asked and threw his jacket over his shoulder._

"_Calling me that… Pretty boy?" Reid asked with a frowned proving he was deep in thoughts again._

"'_Cause you are" Morgan said with a shrug. Reid blinked a few times._

"_W-what?" he asked quietly and looked around to see if anyone had heard that._

"_I'm just saying. You're kinda cute, everybody knows that"_

_Morgan was smiling and Reid had to swallow hard. Was he dreaming? Did Derek Morgan just say that to him._

"_Is this some kind of a joke?" he asked. Morgan looked at him for a moment, then leaned in and gave Reid a soft kiss on the lips._

_Reid was in shock and did nothing but stare at him._

"_Now you've got the night to figure out if that was a joke" Morgan said, and then he left._

_Reid just sat there. He could still feel Morgan's lips on his. It took him a minute or so before the shock had sunk in, and after that he couldn't help but grin like a complete fool._

That was over a year ago, but Reid loved him more than ever and he knew Morgan felt the same about him, wich was of course the reason to why he wanted to tell the others but…

Reid sighed and the elevator doors finally slid open. He walked quickly down the hall and entered the bullpen, left his jacket and bag at his desk and headed for the lunch room to get another mug of coffee.

As soon as he had entered the room, Morgan approached him with a large, pale blue mug. Prentiss, JJ and Rossi greeted him and he accepted the coffee from Morgan.

"You smell good" Morgan said quietly to him and Reid swallowed in mild panic. The others were just a few feet away.

"Thank you" he said and looked at Morgan, hoping the others would think he was thanking him for the coffee.

"Are you okay, Reid? You look a little tense?" Prentiss asked and Reid cleared his throat, as he gave her a fake smile.  
"I'm fine, I just didn't sleep too well…Got some birds outide my bedroom window that keeps me awake. Pidgeons, actually… You know all the noise they make, it can drive you insane"

He drank almost half the large cup of coffee in one sip and the others stared at him. It was obvious something wasn't quite right, but they weren't going to stress it.

"Well, maybe you should get in touch with your landlord… Get rid of them" JJ suggested with a smile. Reid nodded.

The sound of heels clicking against the lenoleum floor approached them, and within seconds Penelope Garcia had entered the room, bright and happy as always.

"Good morning, sweeties, look who's bringing the goodies today" she greeted and placed a large white box on the table. Morgan was first to take a peek inside, as always when it came to Garcia's baking.

"Oh, mama those are fine looking cupcakes" he said and picked one up. It was chocolate with pink frosting and silver sprinkles. Typical Garcia. She could brighten up any day.

They sat down and chatted for a while, eating the cupcakes and finishing their coffe, and for a moment Reid forgot all about his worries. He was among friends and it meant a great deal to him.

"So" Garcia said as they all waited for orders. "Chief Inspector honey bun, do we have a case?"

Morgan chuckled a little.

"As far as I know, no" he said and looked over at JJ who slowly shook her head.

"Nope, not right now. I'm still going through some files, trying to prioritize at the moment" JJ said.

"Wich means paperwork" Prentiss sighed. Rossi remained quiet, listening.

Morgan nodded.  
"Yeah. Hotch is in a meeting with Strauus at the moment, he'll be back whenever they're finished" he said and looked over at Reid. "Could we talk in my office?"

Reid looked around at the others, but the question was definatly meant for him.

"Sure"

The others studied them with suspicion.

"Everything okay?" JJ asked and her eyes flickered between Reid and Morgan.

"Yeah, it's nothing. We just need to talk in private" Morgan explained and gave Reid a look before he left the room.

Reid chewed on his lip nervously and followed Morgan to his office.


	3. Chapter 3

Reid was scratching his palm out of nervrosity as Morgan closed the door behind them. The silence was overwhelming and Reid swallowed hard as he sat down in the dark gray chair opposite Morgan's.

"They'll suspect something pretty soon" Morgan started and he too took a seat. Reid frowned and made a face that said he was ignoring that possibility.

"We haven't given them a reason to suspect anything… I think you're overreacting, wich is nothing wrong…" Reid looked up at him and their eyes met. "… It's a normal behaviour. Whenever we get insecure or hide something we automaticly fear that people will find out, it's-"

"Spencer" Morgan interrupted and Reid went quiet. He swallowed hard again. "I think you know very well that I'm not the one scared of them finding out about us"

Reid looked away again and chewed on his lip.

"You're totally right, obviously" he replied. Morgan sighed.

"Why are you so afraid of this?... Isn't this what you want? Us?"

It made Reid freeze and stare at Morgan.

"How can you even ask that? Of course I want us, it's all I've ever wanted – us, but I want our 'us' to involve just you and me and if we tell everyone it won't be like that"

Morgan just looked at him and shook his head slowly.

"It will always just be you and me, Spencer. No one will ever come between us, and you know as much as I do that our team – our friends out there won't ever try to do so"

Reid cleared his throat.

"You might be in charge right now… But Strauss is still your boss and she can make one of us leave the BAU with only one signature, Derek, do you even get that?"

The temper that Morgan noticed in Reid reminded him of the time when Reid was using Dilaudid and it both scared and angered him a little.

"I was about to ask you if you're prepared to risk our relationship but not your job, but it's starting to get pretty obvious to me" Morgan said. Reid was about to cut in, but Morgan wouldn't let him. "Strauss can't afford to lose anyone of us. She handpicked us for a reason and you know that. You know pretty much everything and that's what's making me wonder what it is you really want, Spencer"

Reid's large, deep brown eyes were glazed with tears as Morgan's words completely pierced him.

"I love you" escaped his lips quietly. His throat was getting sore and tight and he couldn't look at Morgan, but he managed to say those words.

"I love you too, Pretty Boy. That's why we're going to tell them the truth" Morgan said softly. He stood up and headed for the door, but Reid grabbed his arm. Their eyes met once again and when Morgan saw the tears in Reid's face, he felt his heart crack open slowly.

"Please Derek, don't do this, I… I can't do this now, I can't, I can't…"

For the first time, Morgan saw Reid break down completely and he realised all this hadn't just been a small problem, but something huge for the man he loved.

He wrapped his arms around the slim man and held him tight.  
"I'm sorry, Spencer. I'm sorry, I didn't get how big of an issue this was to you"

Reid pulled away a little and looked into Morgan's dark eyes.

"This place… These people, it's all I've got. Everything that means something to me is here and I'll go under if I lose it" he sniffed.

It was a tough situation for Morgan. He didn't want to hurt the man he loved, but he knew that if Strauss found out they had been keeping secrets from her, they'd both get suspended from working together.

"If we lie to Strauss we will most certainly lose the ability to work the same cases" Morgan explained quietly. A heavy sigh left Reid's lungs.

"I know…" he began and cleared his sore throat.

Morgan rubbed the sides of Reid's arms gently as he spoke.

"First thing on Monday, okay?"

Reid nodded and swallowed hard.

"It's just… eighty two percent of the couples within the same team or section have been transefered elsewhere and I'm only mentioning the straight ones now"

Reid's eyes showed clear signs of insecurity. Morgan nodded slightly.

"And how many of them actually told their boss instead of letting someone else report it?"

Reid swallowed again.

"Seventy four percent to be exact…"

"Wich gives us a chance of thirty six percent out of the eighty two, it's enough for me, Spencer" Morgan replied. Reid was quick to answer back.  
"When it comes to same sex couples ninety seven percent lost their jobs completely, Derek. Ninety seven percent! That makes this just about impossible"

Morgan sighed.

"I don't want to hide, Spencer. If you're not prepared to tell Strauss then…"

"Then what?"

Morgan sighed again.

"… Then I don't think we should do this"

There was an electric, freezing cold silence for a few seconds, before Reid got up and marched out of the room. Morgan bit his lip and felt a painful knot grow in his chest, but he did not go after him.

…

JJ and Garcia were just about to order their lunch when they saw Reid walk past them with long, quick steps.

"Spence?" JJ asked, but he ignored her and opened the partly frosted glass doors. "Spence?!" she called after him again.

She and Garcia shared a look, before JJ got up from her chair and quickly followed him. He had already entered the elevator and the doors were about to close when she stuck her hand in and managed to stop them. "What's wrong?" she asked.

He didn't look at her, but cleared his throat.

"I don't feel that well. I need to go home for a while…"

The doors closed behind JJ and her clear, blue eyes flickered between his deep brown ones.

"Was it something Morgan did?" she asked. He shook his head.

"I just don't feel well… I think I might have caught a bug…"

He bit his lip and it was a clear sigh to her that he wasn't telling the truth.

"Spence, it's me… Tell me what's wrong"

He then looked straight at her, his eyes watered.

"If De-…" he hesitated and swallowed. "… If Morgan won't listen to me, neither will you"

The elevator doors opened as they reached the entrance floor and he walked past her and out of the elevator. JJ frowned and turned around, watching the man who was just like a brother to her, leave the building.


	4. Author's note

Hey!

It's been forever but I want to let you know that I'm going to try and continue this story.

I don't know when the next chapter will be up, but I'll start writing it ASAP!

Thank you so much for the nice reviews and for your patience!

/Kimona


	5. Chapter 4

_Dear Diary_

Reid hesitated for a second and stared at the words he had scribbled. He quickly drew a line over them and chewed on his lip.

_Stupid diary_

_Everything is even more upside down than it was before. Derek is doubting my love…_

_How can he? He's just about as important for me as oxygen._

_Do you understand? I need him to survive!_

_Everything that's spinning around in my head right now, the pain I've got in my chest and up through my throat, it's all very foreign to me and I don't really like it._

_I'm actually getting nauscious._

Reid put the pen down and rubbed his face with his hands and sighed. He was really such a pussy. Not only was he keeping a diary, he was too afraid to admit to his friends he was gay. He stretched his fingers and they made a cracking sound, before he picked up the pen again.

_If I could I would shoot 20 milligram of dilaudid through my vains and crawl underneath my warm covers, but I can't do that right now. I must not._

_Basically, diary… I have to admit something very illogical and strange._

_I will die without Derek._

A tear fell onto the paper, slowly smudging the shiny, black letters spelling the name "Derek" and Reid realised he was crying heavily.

He couldn't stop the tears from coming and he ended up throwing the diary into the wall and lean forward, burying his face in his hands.

…

JJ understood that something had gone really bad during Morgan's talk with Reid, and when she returned to the bullpen, she sat back down next to Garcia and Prentiss. She lowered her voice in a whisper.

"Something is definatly not good" she said and the two women looked at her. She figured Garcia had already told Prentiss what had happened.

"What did he say?" Garcia asked. JJ sighed and shook her head.

"That he wasn't feeling well and something about Morgan not listening to him and therefor we wouldn't either…"

Garcia made a troubled face.

"Does that mean my chocolaty sweetness hurt our baby boy genius?"

It wasn't really a question, but JJ still shrugged.

"Could you try to find out? I mean you can talk to him about anything"

Prentiss cleared her throat.

"Maybe we shouldn't stick our noses in this"

Garcia and JJ frowned slightly at her.

"I'm going to see if Spence will talk to me… If I just wait for him to calm down a bit" JJ said and Garcia nodded.  
"I don't get it. Those two never fight… I'll try to get sir Morgan to talk to me"

Prentiss just shook her head and got up.

"I am not going to get involved in this. Let me know when our lunch arrives"

She pushed the metallic chair back in against the table and walked away. JJ fiddled with a pencil.

"I'm a little worried about him, Pen" she began and looked into Garcia's bright eyes, surrounded by thick black and green glasses. "He gets very emotional when he's upset, I'm a little scared to leave him alone"

Garcia gave her a reassuring smile.

"Hey, it's baby boy genius we're talking about. He needs some alone time and a good book" Garcia said. JJ chuckled.

"It's not like I actually beleive he'll hurt himself, I just think he's not the kind of person who asks for help. You have to sort of feel the moment and find out yourself, you know"

Garcia sighed and shook her head.

"I think I need to have a chat with my chocolate muffin. He probably made a joke and Reid got it all wrong"

Morgan was looking through the files of the past cases he needed to write reports on, but it was difficult for him to focus on it. He had a gnawing feeling inside him about Reid and the rest of the team sure would get suspicious if Morgan all of a sudden decided to show his worries. He tried to shake off his thoughts of worry. _What was there to worry about? Boy genius was always like this. Shaking like a leaf._

He heard heels clicking and knew he was being apporached by Queen Tech herself.

"There you are, my chocolate Adonis" Garcia said and plumped down in the chair upposite him. "I think there's something going on here"

Her words did make him a little nervous. If she knew, Reid would believe he had told her and he wouldn't forgive him for it.

"Huh?" Morgan asked with a raised eyebrow. Garcia just sighed and tilted her head slightly.

"Well it seems our little genius is missing and I have a strong suspicion it's your fault" she accused and poked him on the arm with her purple feather-pencil.

He didn't want to have this conversation.

"Oh, baby girl, you hurt me with these accusations" he teased. "Why would I hurt pretty boy?"

"You tell me"

She crossedher arms over her chest and waited patiently for his explanation. He knew she could sit there all day if she had to.

"It's not that easy, Garcia" he said. "Y'know how he is. He's sensitive..."

She squinted her eyes and glared at him.

"What. Did. You. Do?"

He sighed and leaned back in the chair. What was he going to do?

...

There hadn't been a case that day, wich gave the team the oppurtunito to go home to be on call whenever they were done with their files.

Morgan, however, had been forced to work late since his mind had been elsewhere and the talk with Garcia had lasted for almost an hour, seeing as she always wanted the juicy details aswell.

"_You. Are. Kidding me!" she gasped and stared at him. "My cocopuff and cutiebrain together... Like really together"_

_He had nodded._

"_Yeah"_

"_For how long have you two been sneaking around making out here and there when none of us could see?" she asked with her hands on her hips. He smirked a little._

"_Since the After-Work party... last year"_

_She squealed and jumped up and down, clapping her hands together._

"_Oh my muppet, tell me everything!"_

_He raised an eyebrow and cleared his throat._

"_Well... 'thing is, I don't even know. We were just sittin' there at the table, he looked at me with that look, y'know, that he gets when he knows the right answer to something and can't wait to get it out..."_

"_Uh huh, go on"_

_He smirked at her excitement._

"_Well, I got up and headed for the bar to get another round for us, and when I stood there waiting for the drinks, he came up behind me. So I turned around and we said nothing. Didn't have to. He just looked at me with this fire in his eyes and I just lost it. I jumped his bones and we made out, just a few feet away from you all and you didn't notice"_

_Garcia's jaw had dropped. She couldn't believe it._

"_And then?" she quizzed. _

_He gave her a mischievius grin._

"_I'm not giving you the details, baby girl. Let's just say he spent that night at my place"_

_He could tell she was taking it all in, and she loved it, as if it was some magical Walt Disney flick._

It was just past 8 p.m and Morgan decided to go check on Reid. It had him a little worried that he hadn't gotten a text message or phone call from Reid that entire day.

He got into his newly washed and polished sports car and drove out of the garage at Quantico.

"_So when I told him we had to tell everyone, he just freaked"_

_Garcia was frowning as he spoke. She drummed her pen against her hand._

"_This can't just be about work, can it? I mean he knows Hotch would do anything to bend the rules for his team"_

_Morgan shrugged._

"_I don't know. All I know is that it'll be easier if we're honest instead of them finding out some other way and I tried to explain it to him, but he won't listen"_

Morgan turned and drove down the block, where Reid lived. It was getting dark, but most lights were on in the windows and Morgan could hear music. Probably a party going on somewhere... in the middle of the week. Kids today...

As he entered the appartment building where Reid lived he noticed the music was coming from the same corridor. As he approached Reid's door he realised that the music was actually coming from Reid's appartment, and it wasn't the typical music he'd listen to either. The bass was pounding through the walls. Morgan used the spare key he'd gotten from his lover and opened the door.

It was completely dark appart from a light in the corner of the livingroom. He closed the door and walked in through the hallway slowly. The music was loud enough to wake the dead and Morgan recognized the song as _More_. Definatly not Reid's type of music. He noticed Reid on the floor, shirt undone half way, tie loose, his hair was a mess and one empty bottle of whiskey on the coffee table, aswell as one with 2/3 remaining in Reid's tight grasp.

"Since when do you listen to Usher?" Morgan asked and turned the volume down.

"No" Reid slurred and sat up. "It's really good... for drinking" he said with a chuckle and stood up on shaky legs. He walked unsteadily up to Morgan, leaning onto his chest with the Whiskey bottle still between his slender fingers. His face so close to Morgan's he could feel his warm breath and the strong scent of the smoky alcohol.

"Why are you drinking?" Morgan asked softly. Reid bit his lip and his eyes went between staring at Morgan's mouth to his eyes.

"See, you wonder because it's irrational behaviour" Reid explained with a slur. "... and I'm not an irrational guy..."

He seemed mesmerized by Morgan's lips and traced them with his fingertips.

"No you're not" Morgan said and removed the bottle of whiskey from Reid's hand. "So what happened?"

Reid licked his lips and leaned in closer.

"I was really sad, but... Right now..." his large, brown eyes looked up into the older agent's and Morgan knew he could manipulate him into most things with that puppy dog stare. "... I'm just really horny" Reid continued in a whisper. Morgan bit his lower lip.

"We should get you to bed, pretty boy"

Reid snaked his arms around Morgan's neck and placed soft kisses on his lips.

"Could you just... for once, treat me like an adult?" Reid whispered. "... I'm just a little drunk"

He smiled and Morgan couldn't handle that smile. It was the cutest thing he knew.

"No, baby boy, you're really, really drunk"

He stroked the side of Reid's face and let his fingers linger in his short curls.

"Give me the lecture tomorrow" Reid whispered with a deep lust in his voice. "Right now, I need you"

He moved Morgan's free hand down his own front and placed it between his legs as he hissed and took Morgan's lower lip between his teeth. Morgan couldn't resist it and pushed Reid back against the wall, causing the remote to the stereo fall to the floor and raise the volume.

_If you really want more, scream it out louder, _

_Get it on the floor, bring out the fire, _

_And light it up, take it up higher, _

_Gonna push it to the limit, give it more._

Morgan was all over him, panting, grabbing him, licking, kissing, attacking his mouth. Reid groaned into his mouth and Morgan grabbed him by the hair to pull him back as he needed air.

"You know what, pretty boy…" he panted. "… this is a good song"


	6. Chapter 5

Reid woke up feeling cold. He opened his eyes, but the streaks of sunlight made his head pound aggressivly. He closed them again and groaned. The covers were missing and he guessed he must've kicked them off in his sleep. He slowly turned the other way and heard movement from his appartment and the scent of coffee spread through the air. He opened his eyes again and looked over at the door. It was slightly open, but he couldn't see anything but a soft light through the small gap.

He sat up and pain shot through his head like a flash of lightning. He sat there for a minute with his legs over the edge. Sure thing, the covers were on the floor and he felt a bit dizzy. He noticed his clothes next to the covers and found he was naked. He staggered over to the dresser and reached into the drawers for a pair of boxers and socks. With one eye squeezed shut he put the boxers on aswell as one purple and one red sock. He couldn't help but think of the character Clopin from the Hunchback of Notre Dame as he saw that combination. The sound of a cupboard being closed in the kitchen interrupted his thoughts and he quickly grabbed his bathrobe from the chair next to the dresser and walked out of the bedroom while he put it on. He tied it around his waist and entered the kitchen.

"Mornin' hun" Morgan said with a smirk and handed him a large mug of coffee and two Aspirin. "You want more sugar in it?"

Reid just took the mug and shuffled over to the kitchen table, before he sat down and took a large gulp of coffee.

"My head is killing me" he mumbled as he licked the pills from his hand and swallowed them with some more coffee. Morgan sat down opposite him with a snicker.

"You look adorable, pretty boy"

Reid put the mug down and looked at him with even darker circles than usual under his eyes and his chestnut hair ruffled and messy.

"I'm never drinking again" Reid groaned and rubbed his face with his hands, letting his slender fingers run through his hair. Morgan took a sip of his own coffee and shrugged.

"Why did you?"

"What?"

"Drink... Last night you drank a whole bottle of whisky and had just started on the second one when I walked through the door..." Reid sighed and sat back in his chair, looking away. "And..." Morgan continued. "You were listening to Usher"

Reid frowned.

"Really? It's not my kind of music"

"Exactly... So why did you?"

Reid knew he wasn't going to get away from that one. He brought the mug to his lips again and drank some more coffee.

"Can it wait until my headache's gone..." Reid tried but Morgan shook his head.

"No way, you're not getting out of this one"

Reid sighed and fingered the corner of the table.

"Honestly... I'm not sure, I don't use alcohol to solve my problems, it's not who I am and I'm a little shocked I'm sitting here hungover right now" he began. Morgan looked at him and their eyes met. He could tell Reid was confused and tired. "... I guess I lost control after you made up your mind about telling the others about us"

Morgan frowned and shook his head softly.

"I will never get you" he said with his soft, yet crispy voice. "I don't get why you're so afraid of telling our closest friends about us"

Reid was nervously drumming the side of his mug with his fingertips.

"It wouldn't be hard for me if one of our closest friends hadn't also been our boss" he said and swallowed hard before he continued. "A-and his boss happens to be a fag hating republican who would have no problem with fireing him if he didn't move one of us to a different department, before she'd fire both of us and you just don't seem to get it, you're so blind to the fact, you're-"

He was cut off his quick ramblings by Morgan's strong hands wrapped around his slender fingers in a gesture of security and for him to calm down.

"Spence, look at me"

Reid let his eyes meet Morgan's and he could see both seriousness and adoration reflecting in his dark eyes. "I'm not asking you to rush this, but Hotch will be more able to deal with it if we tell it to him straight. You trust him, he trusts you and if he finds out from someone else that we've been sneaking around..."

Reid nodded, his throat sore and dry. He licked his lips and leaned in with his elbows on the table.

"I know, I know... b-but what if.."

"I will ask for a transfer myself"

Reid knew that those words were meant to comfort him, but they didn't. It would mean the BAU would lose a good agent and possible group leader. They would all suffer without Morgan and they would blame him for it. It was as if Morgan could read his mind. "... Don't worry, it'll be alright"

Reid just nodded. He didn't want things to change just because he loved a fellow agent. Had Gideon been around it would've been different, he had a certain way of handeling everything quietly and without a fight. He knew both Hotch and Rossi would fight a war for them if they had to and he didn't want them to.

Morgan got up and put his mug in the sink.

"You better hurry, Pretty boy" he said. "We've got to be at work in an hour and you need to shower"

Reid frowned and his eyes followed the other agent.

"Are you telling me I smell or something?" he asked. Morgan smirked and walked up to him.

"Nope. I'm telling you I'll have a hard on all day if you look like that" he responded and ruffled Reid's hair. "Neither professional nor nice of you, genius"

Reid smirked as Morgan walked past him and found his headache was pretty much gone. He finished his coffee and decided he could go one day with just washing up at the sink.

...

The sound of clicking heels made the team aware Garcia was on her way there and they got up, as if it was their instinct to do so, and sure enough just seconds later the blonde whirlwind made her way into the bulpen dressed in a colorful Desigual dress, green stockings and glittery pink heels.

"Good morning, my lovelies" she greeted with a smile. "Boss-man is on his way, we have a case and I am so thankful I overslept this morning so I missed breakfast, because this is just..." She stuck two fingers in her mouth and walked up the stairs with the others following behind her.

They sat down around the table in the conference room and waited for Hotch. Garcia winked at Reid as Morgan sat down next to him and it made him blush. There was a strange silence around them and JJ gave Reid a suspicious look, one eyebrow raised.

"What?" he asked her, acting as if he had no clue. She shrugged.

"Are you feeling better?" she asked and scanned his slightly messy hair and bruised neck. "Did you restle with that bug or what happened to you?" she asked with a giggle. He blushed again.

"I'm feeling fine... just fine" Reid said and looked over at Morgan with a smirk.

Hotch walked in and straightened his tie as he sat down.

"Sorry I'm late, I've had a dozen meetings with Strauss and some supervisors of the FBI" he sighed and grabbed the tablet in front of him.

"Is there a problem? Why all these meetings?" Prentiss asked. Hotch didn't move his eyes from the tablet as he answered.

"No need to worry, we are handeling it the best way we can, I will tell you more when I find out exactly what's going on myself" he looked up at Garcia and she clicked her remote. Pictures of blood and dirt covered bodies flashed onto the screen along with some pictures of people smiling at the camera.

"Okay, we're being called out to a case in San Fransisco where young men and women have been found murdered and mutilated in different parts of town. There's been a total of seven bodies found but only five have been identified..." she clicked the remote again and showed the pictures from the autopsy, the bodies now cleaned up. "... all the victims were between 18 and 22 and had parts of their skin cut out and removed wich makes the local police believe they were all wearing tattoos and the unsub removed them on purpose. The identified victims families have confirmed they did have tattoos"

"Have they told the local police what kind of tattoos the victims had?" Morgan asked. Garcia nodded.

"They all had different tattoo's, for example Lara Henderson, she had multiple tattoos, all different, for example Tinkerbell on her calf and the Scorpio sign in her neck. Both removed, just like Justin Cavanaugh's skull and snake on his arm."

Reid's eyes flickered across the screen as his fingers drummed against his bottom lip, gathering the information he had infront of him.

"Tattoo's have been looked upon as an artform for centuries, actually, tools and ink were recovered from caves dating back 40 000 years..." Reid began. "...People have gotten tattooed for a number of reasons, for example they were used in rituals and as a way to show the others you were a strong warrior, much like today's medals, the more you had, the more respect you gained from others. Also, they've been used to beautify the body for social, magical and even erotic purposes-"

"Reid" Hotch interrupted and looked at him with a glare that told him he should get to the point.

"My point is, the unsub might be collecting these tattoo's for another purpose than the actual symbol the victims chose. It could be the unsub is a collector of tattoos for a reason. It would either be that he collects any tattoos or these specific ones because they've all been done by the same artist. We need to know if all the victims got their tattoo's from the same artist"

Hotch got up and moved towards the door.

"Wheel's up in thirty, we're meeting with the cheif of the CCSF this afternoon"

Morgan followed Hotch with his eyes and as soon as their boss had left the room, his eyes landed on the younger agent next to him. It was hard for Morgan to ignore that messy hair and those big, dark pools that were Rid's eyes. He never could've imagined that the pure and innocent young genius would look so good being rough in a way. Reid was the type of person who'd never go to work without a shower, clean clothes and combed hair. He would either use a tie or a scarf and would normally hide the hickies on his neck, but Morgan adored the sight of Reid in that slightly unbuttoned, white shirt, hair just a hot mess, neck and chest bruised from the night before and his eyes framed with dark circles.

He bit his lip. God, Reid looked amazing.

"While you're still on the ground I'll borrow you for a few minutes, hun" Garcia said as she grabbed Reid by the arm and dragged him out of the chair.

"What? Why?" he asked as he followed her. She remained quiet until they reached her den and she closed the door behind them.

"I know, honey" she blurted out. Reid frowned in confusion.

"Know what?"

She chuckled and poked him in the chest with her finger.

"You and my Nougat Wonder are a thing" she said with a smirk. Reid swallowed and stared at her.

"H-how did you... Did he, h-how-"

She placed a finger on his lips and pushed him towards the chair, causing him to fall down in it and remain seated.

"Just sit and listen to moi" she began. "I had to drag everything out of him and he didn't want to tell me, but I am so happy for you"

She sat down opposite him and he chewed on his bottom lip. She smiled and ruffled his hair.

"Don't worry, Reid. You're my boy genius and I love you, and I love Morgan and this- what you have gives me a reason to love you twice as much"

He swallowed again and frowned at her.

"How can you be so okay with this?" he asked. She smiled again.

"Morgan have been checking you out for years and you need some lovin', hun" she said with a chuckle. "And look at you, only someone who got some the night before can be glowing like that while looking like a complete mess"

It made the corners of his mouth twitch and he couldn't help but smirk at her.

"You might think you know everything, but that is classified information" he said with a wink and got up. She gave him a playful slap on the shoulder.

"Well, before you go..." she began with a soft kindness in her voice. He turned and faced her again. She smiled, but there was both seriousness and honesty in her eyes. She grabbed his hands softly, just holding them. "... Don't worry about telling the others. It might seem frightening and as if you're all alone exposed to the world, but there is nothing or no one who's going to hurt you or think less of you. You are loved, Spencer, both of you, and if there is anyone who will ever be there when you need an army- it's us"

He just stood there for a moment, taking in her words, feeling the strong, yet caring hold she had of his hands. He nodded.

"A part of me knows that, and really believe it too, but then... This other part of me is telling me to be reasonable and think one step forward..."

"Well, sometimes you might have to forget what you know and just accept that your heart wants one thing and your mind is trying to be reasonable, but reasonable isn't always right" Garcia said with a crooked smile. "If you just take a moment and ignore the facts and the knowledge and just listens to what this wants-" she moved her hand to his sternum, feeling his heartbeat against it. "-what your heart and soul really want"

He smiled and wrapped his fingers around hers, moving her hand to his lips and gave it a soft peck.

"Everyone needs a Penelope Garcia in their lives" he said softly. He could tell she had tears forming in her eyes.

"People might not think so, or know so, but you are the strongest person I've ever met" she said quietly. "You can do this"

**AN: What did you think of this chapter? Please R&R and thank you so much for all the love and support you're giving me by reading my fanfics!**


	7. Chapter 6

Reid was looking out through the window as they drove down on Baker Street, passing the pastel painted houses and local cafés. The sun had not set yet and it was a beautiful day. The sky was blue and a few clouds were sprinkled across the sky like cotton candy.

It was hard to sit next to Morgan with JJ in the backseat. He wanted to tell her everything. They usually didn't keep secrets from eachother, but this was different. It was important that they talked to Hotch first and francly, he wasn't looking forward to it.

He had appreciated everything Garci had told him but it made him nervous to know that she knew about them, and probably alot too. Too much.

He watched the golden sun through his dark shades. The sky would soon turn pink and fade into purple before the night would cover the streets in darkness.

"What was the name of the Officer we're meeting at the site?" Morgan asked and glanced over att JJ in the rearview mirror.

"Sheriff Harmond" she replied. "The body has been removed from the sight and the evidence have been collected, but the site remains sealed off to the public"

Morgan parked the car and the three agents approached the yellow tape surrounding the alley. They were greeted by a middle aged man wearing a short sleeved shirt and black tie.

"Sheriff, I'm Special agent Jerau" JJ said and shook his hand. "This is agent Morgan and agent Reid" she introduced.

"Thank you so much for coming out here" the man began. "We need all the help we can get"

The followed him into the alley and he explained what they had found at the scene. The alley was pretty well hidden and besides for some graffiti and an old dumpster, it was empty.

"It's definatly secluded enough for someone to commit a murder" Morgan said as he used his flashlight to examine the place. Reid was kneeling as he scanned the ground.

"There's not alot of blood here." He began and a slight frown formed on his face as he took the information in. He reached down and found a dark stain on the ground. "I've found motor oil. The unsub probably used a car to get the victim here"

"So he either killed the victim somewhere else and transported the body or he killed him in the car" JJ began, almost speaking to herself. "Either way there should have been quite alot of blood in the car"

Morgan got his phone out from his pocket and dialed Garcia's number. She was quick to answer, as usual.

"_Oh, darling you just read my mind, didn't you"_

He smirked.

"You know I can't go to long without hearing that sweet voice" Morgan said in a seductive joke. "I need you to check out the closest traffic camera. We're looking for a vehicle leakin' oil that the unsub used to transport the victim"

He could hear her click her tongue.

"_That's not very much to go on"_ she said. _"If you're looking for magic you should ask your little lover boy"_

Morgan glanced over at Reid who kept scanning the place in deep concentration. He put Garcia on speeker.

"Why don't you ask him yourself, you're on speaker" Morgan said. Reid's lips were slightly parted as his eyes scanned the dumpster and suddenly he raised a finger and licked his lips.

"Something scraped against this dumpster and left a trace of paint, it could very well be from a vehile scraping against it as the unsib backed in here" Reid explained.

"_So it must be a truck or some other large vehicle"_ Garcia said, more to herself than to any of them and they could hear her type on the keyboard. _"What color is it?"_

Reid grabbed a plastic bag from his pocket and used his pen to scrape some of it off.

"A pretty distinctive blue" he said. "I'm bagging a sample of it"

"_Alright, I'll be in touch"_ Garcia said and with a click she had hung up.

JJ faced the sheriff, sheilding her eyes from the sun with her hand.

"We should get back and talk to the others and work on our profile" she said and he nodded before he grabbed her free hand and shook it.

"Keep me updated" he said and JJ just nodded before they headed back to the car.

...

Morgan parked the car outside the San Francisco police department and looked at JJ through the rearview mirror.

"We'll be right there" he said and she understood he wanted to talk to Reid in private. Though she found it a little strange, she respected his wish and got out of the car.

Morgan had sensed Reid was on edge during the drive to the crime scene and it was important for him to find out why. He looked over at the younger agent and found he was still being distant. It was silent for a moment, appart from the song that played silently on the radio, some acoustic version of a pop song. Reid was looking out through his window and Morgan could see the reflection of his lover's face in the glass. He had those deep lines in his forehead wich meant he was either deeply focused or frustrated.

"Care to tell me what's goin' on?" Morgan asked softly. Reid didn't answer, but Morgan could tell he had heard him, because he licked his lips and his eyes left the window to stare downward. Reid bounced his leg nervously up and down and fingered a thread on his pants. Morgan sighed and moved closer, putting his arm behind Reid's seat.

"Spencer" Morgan said in a deep voice and Reid finally turned his head to look at him. Morgan smiled. "Hey..."

Reid gave him a sad, crooked smile and it made Morgan frown with concern and confusion.

"Don't look at me like that" Reid said quietly.

"Like what?" Morgan asked. Reid scanned his expression with his big, hazel eyes.

"With pity"

Morgan shook his head slightly, not breaking their gaze.

"I don't" he simply answered. "You seem a little blue and I'm concerned"

Reid let out a deep sigh and closed his eyes before he looked away.

'_Cause what you don't understand is_

_I'd catch a grenade for ya_

_Throw my hand on a blade for ya_

_I'd jump in front of a train for ya _

_You know I'd do anything for ya  
I would go through all this pain _

_Take a bullet straight through my brain _

_Yes, I would die for you, baby _

_But you won't do the same_

"We have a case to work on" Reid said and went to open the door, but Morgan was quicker and locked the doors. Reid pulled at the handle frantically. "Let me out, Derek" he demanded.

Morgan shook his head.

"Not until you've talked to me" Morgan said, his voice calm and steady. Reid kept tugging at the handle, his breath escalating.

"Let. Me. Out!"

He threw his thin frame over Morgan to reach for the button to unlock the doors, but Morgan was both quicker and stronger and within a second he had Reid's wrist in a tight grip.

"What the hell is going on, Spencer?" he yelled. Reid panted and pressed his lips together, his eyes glazed as he tried to hold back tears.

"Please, just... just let me out" he begged quietly. Morgan stared at him, completely shocked by the younger agent's sudden behaviour.

"What happened?" Morgan asked.

Reid's chest heaved up and down as he tried to control his breathing, but it was obvious he was angry and close to a panic attack.

"I'll break the window if I have to" Reid said. "Now, let go of my wrist"

Morgan didn't move and within seconds Reid was struggeling to get out of his grip, hyperventilating between sobs.

"What. Happened?!" Morgan yelled and it finally blew over for Reid.

"NOTHING FUCKING HAPPENED"

Morgan was taken back by that and let go of him. Reid ran his fingers through his hair and leaned forward towards his own knees.

Morgan felt so confused. He didn't understand a thing about what had just happened.

He moved his hand to place it on Reid's back, but as soon as his fingertips touched the fabric of Reid's vest the younger agent's head shot up, turning his back away from Morgan.

"No!"

There was a trail of tears on his cheeks and his eyes looked even bigger, more innocent. Suddenly, Reid's lips were on Morgan's in a desperate kiss. Morgan could taste the salty tears on his lips and he wanted so badly tolinger in the kiss, but they were working and he had to push Reid off of him.

Reid looked him straight in the eye, chest still heaving.

"I hate you" Reid whispered and it stung Morgan straight through the core. "I hate you for stressing me into telling the others and you're the one who's pretending"

Morgan didn't know what to say. He just stared at the man he loved so deeply, feeling his heart tear at the edges. "I hate that I love you" Reid finished with a shaky voice.

"... Why now?" Morgan asked in a whisper. Reid shook his head.

"I've felt this for a long time but you couldn't see it..." the young agent replied. "... You don't see how much I love you... How much it hurts to not being able to-"

His voice broke and his bottom lip shivered. Morgan said nothing, just reached for the button and unlocked the doors.

_But darling I'd still catch a grenade for ya_

_Throw my hand on a blade for ya_

_I'd jump in front of a train for ya _

_You know I'd do anything for ya  
I would go through all this pain _

_Take a bullet straight through my brain _

_Yes, I would die for you, baby _

_But you won't do the same_

Nobody noticed that Hotch, by accident, had seen the whole thing.

**AN: The song is Grenade by Bruno Mars but the version I had in mind is by Gavin Mikhail. Thank you for reading and please review :)**


	8. Chapter 7

**AN: This chapter is my baby and I so hope you'll like it. I have to warn you about the graphic sex in it though. Please R&R :)**

_Dear Diary..._

_I suck!_

_I can't handle this mix of emotions anymore. I can't sleep, I'm not hungry... _

_I can't focus anymore. All these thoughts and feelings keep interfeering with my work._

_I've had tacycardia all day... All because nothings seems to go as I've planned._

_You see, for the first time I liked breaking the rules._

_I liked sneaking around with Derek, feel the excitement as we were so close to being caught._

_I liked making out in a room with a surveilance camera so we'd have to hide in the most strangest place... I miss it. I want it back, and yet... I want to be able to show the world I'm his and his only, and that he's mine, especially show the world **he** is mine._

_And he doesn't get it. I guess it can be difficult to get me sometimes._

_I hade to get it together and explain it to him the only way I can._

...

A knock on the door caught Morgans attention and he glanced over at the alarm clock. 3.00 am. He hadn't been able to fall asleep, no matter how hard he tried.

He grabbed the gun from his nightstand and placed his hand over the safety as he slowly approached the door. He leaned close to the door so he could see who was on the other side of the door and when he recognized the slender form and long hair framing the perfectly sculpted face, he put his gun away and unlocked the door.

Reid's head was tilted down and his eyes slowly looked up to meet Morgan's. The older agent could feel his puls thump hard in his chest, the beating echoing in his ears.

"We need to talk" Reid said quietly. Morgan swallowed and nodded as he stepped aside to let him in.

He closed the door gently and locked it before his eyes traveled back to the young genius. His throat, his lips... He noticed Reid glanced over at the lock before his sparkling, hazel eyes met Morgan's. Reid licked his lips. "I-I want to apologize... for my behaviour earlier"

Morgan scanned his features and sighed calmly.

"I don't really understand what happened... but I never meant to hurt you" Morgan told him. Reid took one step closer and reached out, resting his palm against the darker agent's cheek and Morgan leaned in to it.

"You've never hurt me" Reid said, his eyes glistening. "I keep hurting myself. I worry about us and it consumed me"

Morgan's raven eyes glittered and he let his fingers slide over Reid's hand, embracing it with his own.

"There's nothing to worry about, pretty boy" Morgan assured him and brought the younger man's hand to his lips and gave his slender fingers a soft kiss. "My pretty boy"

Reid let his hand slip away from Morgan's and slowly slid it up the man's shoulder until it rested at the back of his neck. He took another step closer to Morgan and leaned in, brushing his lips softly against the other agent's and closed his eyes. Morgan was happily surprised by this and wrapped his arms around Reid's skinny waist and gave in to the kissing. They were tender, loving brushes against the other's lips at first and they stood there, chest to chest, just gently kissing. It was so much more than just an _"I'm sorry"_. Every kiss was a _"I miss you"_, _"I love you"_ and _"Never let me go"_.

Reid slid his tongue along Morgan's bottom lip and the muscular man parted his lip, inviting Reid to explore his mouth. Their tongues played more eagerly with eachother and Morgan slowly pushed Reid back against the wall, causing his thin frame to hit the lightswitch and they kissed in the blueish darkness. Reid moaned softly into Morgan's mouth and wrapped both his arms around the other agent's neck, not breaking the kiss.

Hot, moist breaths tickled the sensitive skin on their lips as their groins rubbed against eachother. Reid tilted his head back, lips parted in a deep, lustful sigh and Morgan kissed down his neck, feeling the goosebumps against his lips.

He licked the salty skin of Reid's throat and wrapped his mouth around his earlobe. Reid gasped and squirmed against him. Morgan smiled against his flesh and nibbled gently, sucking the sweet skin of his earlobe as his hands roamed the younger agent's body lightly, sending shivers of pleasure down Reid's spine. Morgan could tell he was getting hard and grounded his own arousal against his lover's.

"Oh, Derek..." Reid moaned out of breath.

Morgan slid his tongue along the other man's jawline, planting kisses on his chin and slid a hand down the young agent's pants and moved to suck on his Adam's apple.

A deep groan escaped the young genius throat and his hands went up Morgan's shirt, those long, slender fingers stroking, clawing, exploring the other man's chest before he forced Morgan's face to his again, catching the older agent's bottom lip between his teeth. As he pushed him towards the bed.

It didn't happen often, but Morgan loved it when Reid took commando, giving in to his deepest desires.

He pushed Morgan down on the bed and climbed on top of him, pushing his arms down on each side of his head, his hands in a tight grasp around Morgan's wrist.

The darker agent felt the fire burn inside him as he watched the dark lust in Reid's eyes. His dark, chestnut hair framed his ivory skin perfectly.

Reid leaned in and kissed him again, wet and messy and Morgan let out a groan from deep within his chest.

Reid pulled away from the kiss and his hands moved to Morgan's tight t-shirt as he ripped it open like a wild beast. He was panting as he gazed down at the perfectly sculpted body under him. He touched every muscle on Morgan's torso, adoring the sight of the dark, glistening skin under his fingers.

His gaze met Morgan's and Reid pulled his vest over his head before he ripped his own shirt open, buttons flying across the room as he leaned in closer, feeling Morgan's hot skin against his chest. He moved his hips, rubbing his hard arousal against Morgan's and went for another desperate kiss. His soft moans drove Morgan to the brink of insanity and his hands grabbed Reid's ass carelessly. He turned his head to breathe.

"Fuck, pretty boy..." he moaned with a gasp. "I'm burnin"

Reid smiled in triumph, panting as he looked down at his lover.

"God, I love you" he said breathlessly and gave Morgan a rough kiss and left his sore lips, sitting up as he worked on Morgan's belt. His long hair was plastered to the side of his face and Morgan just watched him, amazed by his young lover's desperate actions. He hissed as Reid pulled off his pants and boxers, freeing his painfully throbbing member. Reid moved to get his own pants off, ripping out his belt and throing it God knows where and within seconds his khakis and boxers followed. Morgan sat up and placed his hands on Reid's hips, kissing his flat stomach and looked up at him. Reid was just as hard and eager to cum as he was, but knowing him, he enjoyed the teasing, pulsating pain just as much as Morgan.

The older agent licked the glistening drop from the swollen, pink tip infront of him and Reid felt the muscled in his legs shudder. He hissed by the burning sensation Morgan's warm tongue caused and arched his back, grabbing a strong hold of the back of Morgan's shaved head, pushing himself further into Morgan's mouth. Morgan hummed against his throbbing flesh and Reid let out a squeal.

"Holy motherfu-"

He couldn't even finish the sentence. His eyes rolled back from the wonderful scorching feeling that surrounded his member as Morgan sucked him deep down his throat.

Reid had to push him off, not wanting it to be over yet, not for a long while. He pinned Morgan down against the matress with one hand firmly on his chest while the other clutched Morgan's throbbing manhood, squeezing the skin down as he teased the wet tip with his thumb. The older agent shuddered in pleasure.

"Sp-Spence" he gasped. "Oh, man... I need you"

Reid smirked and bit his lower lip as he watched his lover's face. He let go of his aching erection and gazed into his eyes with a dark, burning desire.

"Up against the headboard" Reid ordered. Morgan smirked as he backed up against the head of the bed, not wanting to let go off his young lover's lustful, golden streaked eyes. "Turn around!" Reid said with a deep, smoky voice and forced Morgan's arms up against the wall as he was moving too slow for his liking.

Reid sucked on two of his fingers before he pushed them into Morgan, kissing his shoulder as he thrusted with them in and out. Morgan moaned and pushed back against Reid's fingers.

"Just fuck me already" he begged and Reid smirked.

He positioned himself against Morgan's opening and slid in, both of them letting out a loud moan. Reid moved his hands to Morgan's hips and held onto them as he thrusted into the only man he'd ever loved and lusted for.

"Like this?" Reid teased and pulled out halfway, just to thrust hard into him again. "Huh? Like this?"

His voice was demanding and his slim fingers were digging into Morgan's skin.

"Yes..." Morgan moaned. "Fuck, yes"

He moved one hand down and started stroking himself in rythm with Reid's thrusts.

"Ahh, fuck" Reid whimpered, pounding even harder into Morgan, not able to hold it much longer. "I'm so close"

Morgan let out a deep groan.

"Mee too, pretty boy" he panted, his entire body on fire, and shivering cold at the same time. He felt electric. "Come in me, babe... Oh, fuck!"

Morgan's whole body shuddered as he came all over his chest and stomach and he had to support himself with both hands against the wall as Reid's forceful thrusting made the sensation ten times stronger, lasting longer than ever. He trembled in climax.

Reid dug his teeth into Morgan's shoulder as he came, moaning against his copper flesh.

He panted with exhaustion against Morgan's sweaty back before he pulled out and Morgan turned to lay on his back. Reid collapsed next to him and Morgan couldn't help but chuckle as he moved the hair away from his lover's face. Reid smiled at him and snuggled closer, swallowing as his mouth felt dry and nuzzled into Morgan's neck. His hot breath tickled the older man's skin.

"If this is what I get everytime you don't make sense, please, start speaking french at every waken moment"

"Je ne serai jamais un sens nouveau" Reid purred as his finger Morgan's chest. Morgan leaned in and gave him a soft kiss.

"Mmm... I have no idea what you just said, but I like it"

...

The following two days were strange. There was a different, static feel to the air whenever Morgan and Reid were in the same room together. Hotch had not yet approached either of his agents about what he had seen. Honestly, he wasn't even sure what it was that he had witnessed.

He decided to wait with talking to them about it until they got home, even though a part of him wanted to find out straight away.

They did their job, though Reid seemed distracted by Morgan during conversations within the team. Still, his mind had not failed them and it had, again, helped them find the unsub.

On the plane back home, JJ was watching Reid as he stared down at his book, not taking in a single word. His legs was shaking nervously up and down and he was stroking the knuckle of his thumb against his lips. He had even darker circles around his eyes and he looked tired, but there were a distant spark.

Morgan had his headphones on and was totally lost in the music. It helped him keep his mind off other things, other certain things...

That night had really lightened a new spark between them, much like when they first got together and Reid finally had dared to take some control over the situation.

It was as if they were falling in love with eachother all over again. All it took was a look from Reid his way to give Morgan the butterflies, wanting to grin like a fool.

_Maybe the breakdown in the car was needed for Spencer. To clear the air as much as his mind._

JJ moved to sit next to Reid. She was concerned about his nervous behaviour and wanted to make sure he knew she would listen if he had to talk to someone.

"Hey" she said quietly and put a strand of golden blonde hair behind her ear. His eyes flickered between her and the book a few times before he sat up straight in his chair and cleared his throat.

"Hey" he said and gave her a weak smile. Her blue eyes scanned his face.

"Are you okay?" she asked. Hotch glanced over at the two of them.

Reid shrugged and looked as if he didn't understand her point.

"Yeah, why?"

She sighed and her eyebrows furrowed.

"I can tell something's bothering you" she said in a low voice. He frowned.

"You're mistaken" he answered bluntly. "I'm totally fine"

She nodded.

"Okay, if you say so"

Reid's eyes met Hotch's for a second, before he let his focus get back to the book, staring at the same sentences he'd been for the last hour.

"_Scream it out, empty your lungs. Pour your heart out._

_Let it echo across the canyon._

_You might only have one chance"_

He had been thinking about it for days, juggling between the two options of telling the others or not. He still wasn't sure what he'd do. All he knew was that we was not going to throw Morgan away. Nothing was worth that.

He felt Hotch's eyes almost burn through him. What was up with that?

Reid glanced over at Morgan. He had fallen asleep, headphones still on. He could feel the corner of his mouth twitch as he watched his boyfriend sleep peacefully and tried his hardest not to show the others his adoration for the man.

...

The plane landed a while later and Reid grabbed his go-bag and slung it over his shoulder as he let JJ walk before him. Morgan stretched his limbs drousily and it reminded Reid of a panther. He gave him a quick, but honest smile before he walked down the stairs and out of the plane.

They were all exhausted and their muscles were aching. The team walked together towards the building of Quantico, anxious to fill out the final paper work of the case before they all could go home and enjoy two days off.

They entered the bulpen and Prentiss threw her coat on her chair and went to make a pot of coffee.

They worked in silence, appart from the thumping of Reid nervously hitting his pen against the file on his lap.

Garcia was sitting in Morgan's chair, he on his desk as they talked about the case.

Hotch had been gone for a while, but appeared as he came out of his office, and to their surprise, followed by Strauss. He gave the team a tired smile. Reid dropped his pen.

"Good work with the case, everyone" Hotch said and looked over at Strauss. She smiled and scanned the room, making sure she looked at them all.

"I just want to congrat you all on how quickly you solved this case and probably saved many, many lives" Her voice was turning into a foggy haze. Reid looked over at Morgan who glanced over at him quickly with a smile on his face before he turned his attention back to Strauss. "I wanted to tell you that I am going to have a meeting with the Director of the FBI later this week and I will show him your work and let him know I believe you all deserve a pay raise"

He couldn't hold it back any longer. It was now or never.

Quickly, Reid got up and marched over to Morgan. Before the copper skinned man could even react, Reid had taken his face in his hands and pulled him in for a kiss.

The entire room was silent and for a moment, Morgan forgot where they were and who was watching. He kissed Reid back. It seemed like forever, but it only lasted a few seconds.

Reid pulled away and looked him straight in the eyes.

"I love you, Derek Morgan"

The nervousness in Reid's stomach turned to excitement and his mind was strong. He let go of his lover and turned to look at Hotch and Strauss, who's jaws had dropped and they could do nothing but stare at them. Reid held his arms out, exposing his very soul. "There, I said it".

Prentiss was gaping, completely in shock. JJ waved her hand infront of her face as tears came to her eyes and she couldn't stop herself from smiling.

A silent 'wow' escaped Rossi's lips. Garcia stood up and jumped, both arms in the air in victory.

"Go Reid!" she cheered, before she placed a hand on her chest as she adored the scene that had just played out infront of her.

Morgan was amazed by Reid's sudden bravery and walked up to him, putting his arms around him from behind. Reid couldn't stop smiling.

"It's true" Morgan said. "We're in love.

As if stunned from shock, Strauss briefcase fell out of her hand with a loud thud and Hotch was lost for words.


End file.
